| I wish that we could blow up the speakers |
[16 Sep 2008|06:27pm] |
So..I'm at my 4th week of school. 11 more to go? Something like that.
It's kinda crazy. First day of school, I was psyched. Actually happy to start. Determined to rock this semester all stupid.
Now, I can't wait for it to be over. Been here, done this. I'm over it.
I reckon there's a reason for everything. It's just how it goes.
Second week of school didn't go well for me, like..in an at all way.
Things between my best friend and I got...bad. To say the least.
I don't know where anything stands when it comes to that and..well..
I'm the kind of person that lets any little thing get to him. Unfortunately for me, this isn't just any little thing to me. This is a very important friendship to me. So, with that said, I'm still not exactly great..or..near good. I'm...breathing. I guess that's what counts.
I also went to the doctor due to some dry-heaving and blood-ness there. Was given pills for Gastro-esophageal(sp?) reflux disease. So I've been taking those. My stomach has been behaving much better and I guess my esophagus is happier for it.
Chem 100 seems to be very much a blow off course. It's so frustrating cus I was ready to learn me some nomenclature and start balancing equations. You know, the fun stuff. But, nope. It's an intro course geared towards non-chem majors so we're doing a lot of the...principles of the stuff but..nothing that I think is fun. It's EH. And lectures=me not learning much of anything. The stuff that we'd be tested on, i already have a handle on (thank you Mrs. Owens) and the other stuff is just...stuff I feel is random and unnecessary.
All my other classes have more substance to them, though.
Math 300->writing in mathematics. we've written two 'papers' so far. well, 1 paper and a draft. it's a 1hr/week class so it's not a huge deal.
Math 320->linear algebra. kicking my ass all stupid. gotta work on that.
Math 330->abstract algebra. mutual ass kicking there. i would like to dominate that class.
CL 102->classic literature. going alright. we have a 1 page paper due thursday. Wrote it up last week, just gotta type it up, edit, and I'm el done-o.
I also signed up for Jujutsu with marvin. so we're taking that class on thursdays. also decided to join shpe, hola, and..well..math club. so we'll see how it all goes. Hopefully eta sigma phi actually does things this semester/year. I'm in that. Have been since freshmen year =)
But now..i must go. gotta help out dad. laterz.
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| now I see your testing me pushes me away |
[22 Aug 2008|05:03pm] |
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so..epic fail on my end
i didn't update everyday like i wanted to..but..did we really expect me to?
lol
alright..so..
the day before i last posted i went to summer dance
a girl came up to eric and i...she asked him a question then told him to shut up
she was cool..and she had to pee
the following day i went to the beach with jerry, cris and luis
brandon met us up
it was good times
then i followed it up by a quick reunion thing with a few old friends from grammar school
i left that at 9 cus i didn't want to walk home late
next day was saturday..pablo came over
and then eric came over
then we went to summer dance again
then we got back, pablo spent the night and we watched smallville
well..when we got back, we were watching an episode of smallville
both of us knocked out all retarded
so..we had to rewatch that episode when he woke up..which wasn't til about 1:30pm..lol
it was sunday at that point...
so..then..jerry came over on monday
we grilled meat outside, i made pasta, and we went to harold's chicken to complete our meal for the day
(we did the grilling after the chicken purchasing)
and from there we watched Superhero Movie while eating
the next day was decompression day for me..aka i did nothing
chilled
and such
wednesday..natalie and brandon were to come over for chilling, watching movie or something, and maybe some wii-action or ddr
but..natalie was the only one to make it...brandon was comatose..not..literally..just..really really asleep
so..natalie and i just talked, i made mac and cheese, we talked to nicole on the phone, and waited for brandon..who..didn't show up..lol
so..next day...samgie came over
and so did brandon
we played uno and such..angie ate the rest of my mac and cheese, sam drank the iced tea and ate some popcorn
and then we watched Will&Grace..good times
next day (friday)
left for Cincinnati, Ohio.
5 hours on the road getting there
two pit stops for bathroomage and eating
we went for Projekt Revolution, though we only ended up seeing Chris Cornell and Linkin Park
(videos of them are up on youtube, my name=> eddiesparx)
we spent the night in a hotel in kentucky,
then we made our way back into cincinnati cus my friends wanted to explore the city
we then made our way back...and i got home at 6
I then went to the Chicago Fire game (thanks to Fabby...THANKS! =D )
and I ran into my friend Alicia there..
i didn't get to see her earlier at her art show cus we didn't get back til late
but i got to see her anyway =)
then..sunday..i..did nothing
i think..lol
i just needed a break..cus...lol..did you read all that??? LOL
and..monday i ended up inviting andrew over
then...we went to see Pineapple Express with Marvin, pablo, and ari
tuesday..idunno what i did..i think i cleaned the house somewhat
wednesday, i went with ari for us to get our U-Passes
and we travelled the campus a bit
then we went to union station cus i wanted mcdonald's
my friend Denavious works at the one there..he hooked it up with food
and we made our way back
next day, thursday, i went again to ari's house
cus it was rosa marina's last day
so i spent some more time with her
helped her get her luggage in order
and then we dropped her off at the airport...aka..well, we went in with her
but yeah..then we said our goodbyes and she was off
and..so were we
when we got back, ari and i went to dunkin donuts
i really wanted a banana split
and..well..now is friday..
jerry was gonna come over, but he couldn't make it
hopefully tomorrow, then
but yeah..that's like...a long time of updating handled lol...
school starts monday..woot woot =)
i'm actually excited
ooh..i made mashed potatoes and some fish today for food
yay for me
some good fish i made..yummerz
how are you?
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| i have no better words than "thank you and goodbye." I wish i didn't have to see our love die |
[08 Aug 2008|08:33am] |
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ugh..i woke up with such a headache..HOORRRIIIIIID
my allergies wanted to start acting up last night as i went to bed
and when that happens, i tend to be head-achey in the morning
idunno...i can't explain it. it's so bizarre
but that's not all that attributed to it
at least, i don't think...
i didn't sleep well
woke up from a nightmare,
then woke up from being really hot
then i had what wasn't a nightmare, but it was more of a..really angry dream
i was really angry in this dream
and it caused me to wake up
for the nightmare..it went a little like this...
i had been..somewhere..idunno where
it all made sense at the time
but i hadn't seen my parents in a while
so then, my parents get to the place i'm also at
and my mom tells me that if the cops come, to tell them that she needs to talk to them
in a "give 'em a piece of my mind way"
i was so confused, but she said that when i saw the car, i'd understand
and..i did..i saw the car and the back had a bunch of bullet holes in it
so bizarre
apparently she had been warning the cops about something of the such
(she didn't tell me this..it was dream..instinct..i just KNEW...lol)
then i went somewhere, and there were snaked EVERYWHERE
like first it was just one random snake in the backyard of wherever we were at
but then we were trying to avoid them ALL stupid..there were so many
big snakes, small snakes, skinny snakes, fat snakes, lazy snakes, angry snakes
all sorts of snakes..all sorts of snake-colors
eventually i woke up from this..but i don't remember what triggered the waking up
but i'm glad...waaaayyyy too many snakes..EVERYWHERE
then the angry dream went a little like this
i was at school..and..i didn't do..something necessary
i think it was read the chapters we had to, and V was in my class, and she had been absent when they were assigned
i would've read them or whatever, but i couldn't...because the chapters were assigned in a book that we didn't have
so we were about to go into the classroom, and we heard the teacher (who coincidentally happened to be Mr. Waller, one of my high school teachers) start talking about some exam for the book
so V and I hid outside the classroom in the hallway...but a lot of people did, too
eventually it worked out that we didn't have to take the test til next week, and he somehow knew we were all outside, also, so he had security round us up and bring us in the classroom
then more dream stuff happened..i don't remember what
but it led to it being jerry, ari, and i walking
and we get to this building, and i was like "hmm" well..not really..but it was like a movie theater
they were showing the second matrix movie...and jerry really wanted to see it
so we go in..after jerry got a phone call
and we're buying our tickets (at the concession stand) and jerry got multiple tickets and multiple drinks and multiple popcorns
and i was thinking to myself "did he pay for us, too? he didn't say anything" and he's just there chillin
so i pay for mine and ari's ticket..cus she didn't have her ID and was afraid she wasn't gonna get in the movie so she wanted me to pay
and then there was a chick behind us who worked there, but she was already off the clock, done working
and the ladies at the concession stand were like "why are you still here?" and being generally mean to the chick
and then i asked for the tickets, paid, and then one of the counter ladies said something like "two tickets for (and she said something about the chick behind us, calling her a lesbian and other stuff which i don't remember at all)" and I was like "yes...no..wait..the matrix" it was so bizarre
and then i turn to jerry, and i was like "how many tickets did you get?" after i paid
and he was like "four" and I asked him why he didn't tell me, due to the waste of money, cus i also got drinks and popcorn. and he said that he was just being irrational cus his sister called him and pissed him off. and apparently that made me really angry, cus there were like 3 extra tickets and way too much popcorn and soda, and it was a big waste of money, and at that point i was like..being extra GRRRR at him, and i walked away (in a "okay? fine...since we're already wasting money way, i'm just gonna leave" way). and as i was leaving the movie place, i woke up.
random.
so yeah..didn't get good sleep at all.
i will update at a later time about the events of yesterday, as right now i need to eat and shower and get ready to leave for el beach-o. stupid headache!
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| y cada noche vendra una estrella a hacerme compañia |
[07 Aug 2008|09:57am] |
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they will see us waving from such great heights
"come down now" they'll say
but everything looks perfect from far away
"come down now" but we'll stay
i reckon i slacked for two days on update-age
but to be honest, nothing really happened..like..at all
i don't even remember what happened tuesday
i think i played a lot of guild wars that day
and yesterday i watched my cousin
he wanted to watch The Hulk, so i put that on
and then he played Mario and Sonic at the Olympics..that game for the wii
i made some mac and cheese and ate way too much..i was so full
still i managed to eat a bowl of double-fudge brownie ice cream
then grandma came to pick him up and took us out for some mcdonald's
OH
and here's a little video regarding the storm that i made/edited/what-have-you
it's a little long..but..i think it's entertaining when you watch it the first time
i've watched it like..3-4 times..and..now i'm just bored with it..lol
but i hope you enjoy it!!! lol
I finally returned Fabby's book to her..Tales of the Slayers Vol 2.
i originally got stuck at the pirate slayer story
cus..pirates...bore me..i don't know why
those pirates of the carribean movies..yeah..i fell asleep during all 4 of them
yes..FOUR!
lol..i know it was only three
but i fell asleep on one twice.
alright..here is my plan for today and tomorrow
today:
leave house in a few, meet up with liz/eric..go to le creperie on north side
2845 N. Clark, if i remember correctly
i know how to get there so address matters generally not
be on our way back by around 1 because liz has to be home by 2:30 to watch her sister
Eric and I should be hanging out til around 6
where he may or may not join Natalie, Brandon, possibly others, and I
at Summer Dance
today they're teaching zapateado
Tomorrow:
leave around 11 for beach with cristian, luis, and possibly jerry
brandon may join us..hopefully he does
from there, we'll leave eventually..not too late
cus i gotta get home to shower and get ready
to go to a reunion type thing at 7:30 with a few grammar school kids
i'll only be there for an hour or two..somewhere in between maybe
cus i don't wanna stay out late at all
and i'll be home
and i'll get some rest
and then saturday..maybe i'll invite pablo over and order us up a pizza or something
well..i already did invite pablo over..lol..so it's just about him showing up
and that's about it..lol
well..now..gotta put on my belt, get my camera, fix my hair, and whatever else i need to do so i can get out in 10 minutes =)
ciaozers!
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| por fin podre de nuevo respirar adentro y hondo alegrias del corazon |
[05 Aug 2008|01:02pm] |
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alright..so i didn't get to update last night
but not my fault, i swear!
lol..so this is my update for yesterday....
i woke up...and it was raining all crazy
and i was like "yeah...this might not work out today"
going downtown to see Ryan with Natalie and Nicole
and well...i got a text saying it was canceled
so..owned
so i resigned myself to doing nothing for the day
and ddr-ed
during ddr..got a text from natalie saying about impromptu movie night at her house
so..i finished ddr-ing, showered, and awaited my ride...
somewhere in this, i made time to work on a video blog
which will be up whenever alex finishes editing her parts into it
she's in lockport so i had to email her my portion
so that'll be up..eventually..lol
so yeah..nicole picked me up and we went to natalie's house
josh was there already as was simone (natalie's sister)
josh went to get ice cream randomly..then came back, and eventually danielle arrived too (natalie's other sister)
and while watching tv/picking a movie to watch, the tv went all warning at us
and the lady announcing the severe thunderstorms and tornadoes and such
haha and then she said "take cover now!" LOL
so random and scary
but yeah..we survived
watched Distrubia...i liked it..but it kinda freaked me out
and i didn't want to stay home alone anymore
then took an hour to try and pick a movie
after picking a movie, watched an episode of Run's House
then..started watching Matilda until the power randomly went out
and then the storm came back
all crazy
but before the storm came back
we lost power
there was nothing going on outside..just..random power loss
and well..it was dark..but we had the light from a flashlight
and light from natalie's laptop
so we played twister for a bit
and then we got tired of that and we played connect four
natalie and i played that, and i won..3 times in a row
then it was time to leave cus the storming stopped and we needed to take that chance to escape
got home at nearly 2am
fed the fish
and went to sleep..now i'm here
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| amor, sabes que es lo mejor. amor, entiendeme. |
[03 Aug 2008|10:54pm] |
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day two without parents and sister
the house is far too quiet
and i'm far too bored
more than the usual blah-ness of usuality.
i woke up this morning
couldn't eat anything right off the bat cus my stomach was all jumble-y
then..after a while of checking my accounts and such
i my stomach was settled, so i ate some breakfast
then i headed to petsmart to buy the dove some food
there was still enough left for a couple days
but why wait?
then i came home, showered (cus it was so hot outside and i was uber sweaty)
and then i did like..nothing the whole day
ugh
so bored..lol
oh well..tomorrow should prove to be fun
meeting up with natalie and nicole to meet up ryan
hopefully brandon shows up randomly...that would be cool
but who knows
mmmmm milk aka i'ma go get some..ciao!
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| la gente viene y va, yo me conjelo solo para aterrisar en tu recuerdo |
[02 Aug 2008|07:54pm] |
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howdy howdy
it's been a while
and here i am...a month left til school starts..well..a little less than a month
my parents are in mexico..they left today
so i thought i'd try to at least update this daily
so let's start with my today day
well..my today day started last night
i was picked up to spent the night at marvin/ari's house
they have a cat..they named him Elvis
it generally just plops there
i played some metal gear solid 4..i'm not a metal gear solid fan guy..so..that did not go well for me
and so i gave up
and went to sleep
next day..wake up, and get ready to go to the dunes
and the next day was, of course, today
on the way to the dunes there were laughs and the such
zuly was listening to the gathering on her iPod..i could hear it
so we got there, and headed up the tall and sandy dunes
they were both tall and sandy as my above description indicates
it was a little tiring getting up there, but we did..that rocked
and we made it down to the lake/beach area, but sadly we were not allowed to swim
crazy waves and the such
it was CRAZY
so we chilled there for a bit
ari and i got owned by some waves on the shore
and then we left to go eat
zuly and i frisbee-ed it up til food was ready
and afterwards, ari and i picture-whored it up..aka took lots of pictures
then french strawberry and i did some more frisbee-ing
then they went back to the beach
and i stayed back and played card games with my aunt and uncle
then, it was time to go
sure..it seems like a short amount of time we were there, but we were there for a few hours and it was good times
so then we came back
i was half-asleep the whole time
like..i was in dream-land but i was very aware of EVERYTHING that was going on
and then we got back to the house..and i was groggy all stupid
then zuly dropped me off at home, and i showered, and now i'm here
i'm intense that way
now...to check on my grape kool-aid..cus..i'm thirsty and it's grape and yummy
the kool-aid is both grape and yummy as my above description indicates =P
peace out peeps!
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[25 Feb 2008|09:28pm] |
R.I.P. Gustavo Carrillo
Though I did not know you well, I believe you are now in a better place. My heart, my wishes, my condolences, go out to your family and friends. Your name and memory are forever embedded in the hearts of those you touched.
V, Fil, you guys know I'm here for you guys for always.
Sorry I couldn't say 'bye' V, you were in the middle of talking with lots of people and I didn't want to interrupt.
I thought this was nice...
I guess I'll update a little on what's been going on in my life..it's pretty much all school-wise.
I'm doing pretty well in Math. Today I did/didn't go. Time for explainy.
I did go, I was there. However, the professor, not so much. So, we left after 15 minutes of waiting. Helped someone out on their mcs project from there.
I'm hopefully gonna be doing well on my gov't midterm. I haven't read much..well..i read chapter one..and..the test is through chapter nine.
Bad me.
However, I've been answering questions left and right in lecture and discussion. Mr. Waller prepared us well. Now it's just to get a few terms handled and i should be good for midterm which will be just identification questions and multiple choice.
Symbolic logic..not much to say there. Assuming I don't rush through the exam, I should be fine.
MCS...boy oh boy do you give me trouble. I turned in my first project saturday morning. Our second one was assigned today. He is an awesome man, though. He said we can turn things in late as long as he knows we're working on it. And he knows i work on my shit :-D
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| there's no time to deny that i need you |
[15 Jan 2008|11:09am] |
well..i have 40 minutes before i gotta get scuttling to class...well..i'm actually right near it so idunno..i could take 45 to chill..but i won't
i thought i'd update on my first day of school, which was..yesterday
after a night of easy sleep, as i did not feel any excitement what-so-ever to be going back to school and doing homework, I woke up..as apathetic as ever
so...i scuttled off to school..
took the bus to the orange line, got off on halsted and took the bus
who happens to be on the bus also? well..she got there after me
but..Alex Brown!
she..was kinda late-ish for class..aka she had like..10 minutes to get to class from where we were
she left like...20 minutes earlier from where she's staying, which is closer than from where i'm at...yet, we end up on the same halsted bus..what a slacker
anyway...so yeah..i walk her to class as i arrive an hour early to school, as the per usual
the AA building is freaking ridiculous, by the way (AA=Architecture and Art..or is it Art and Architecture?)
anyway
i'm in class..and..well, the first class i got is the political science one..intro to..and it's all american government which is like..cool
I had Waller for US History in HS
I had Waller for AP Gov sophomore year
I had Waller for AP Gov (again) senior year
so...i should be able to handle this..same concept, right?
but..we've already got a shitload to read..aka..reading in general when it comes to school stuff is uber on the blah for me
gotta read a book, gotta read the text..there are gonna be presentations..i HATE making presentations..
..so..with that..i was already on freak-out mode
so math follows up
and you know me, i'm like..math groupies anonymous, except not so much with the anonymity
this class is gonna be mostly logic type stuff, proofs and the such..not much with the calculations and working things out
that's why i take math..to calculate! not to figure out the provingness about it!
ARG!
so..that was uber bummer
and..then..well..to follow up my logic-based math class, i move on to my logic-based logic class..aka intro to symbolic logic...
fun fun..right?
well..i don't know!
so..i get a break..a 1 hr break to decompress for a bit...i didn't think things were just gonna like...pick up and throw themselves at me like that on the first day
so..i think.."eh..i only have my computer science class next"..can't get much worse
but..to my surprise, much worse it got
also..much to read and understand and blahdy blah blah
so..i have a lot to read in order to get close to catching up to the first day
and..well..on my schedule, i thought i only had 2 1hr classes today with a break inbetween
well...upon further inspection of my schedule, it's 2 2hr classes, breakless
so...yeah
gonna get through this one way or another...if i come out crazy...then..crazy i shall be
but omg...thank jeebus for thursday
i have thursday off
kinda makes me 4 hours of class every day but thursday worth it
now..i'm gonna go..print out my math homework and such..scuttle over to taft hall
and read my computer science book
PEACE!
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| No Se Puede Vivir Con Tanto Veneno... |
[04 Jan 2008|09:28am] |
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So let's back-track a bit while I wait for Will&Grace to come on
I've got a half hour for it, so this may take a while too read
Most likely not though, I'll probably end up scuttling about the house randomly somewhere in the during of the typing this.
Finals were good. Well..they were alright. I got credit for all my classes, so, yay on me.
Diff Eq was where I was worried. I mean, I ended up getting a C in the class which sucks because the last month or so that was where all my academic attention was focused. I really wanted at least that B. I am, however, happy that I passed.
Of course, my mechanical pencil ended up getting fucked up during the exam, so I ended up penning the rest of it.
Hmm.."penning" is a word...apparently, and..though I don't know what it means, it surely cannot mean what I am using it for.
Whatevsies.
So then came Xmas.
I wanted to get Marvin a Cube of Rubik (Rubik's Cube) as I know he really wanted one not too long ago. However, I didn't know if he had already gotten it or not. So...that was a no-go. I tried to call Ari but it was like..the one time she wasn't near her phone. Oh well.
I spent Xmas at Marvin's crib, while my parents when to my grandparent's house.
It was a choice to make and I made it. I helped make some tamales so, I reckon it was only right that I went to eat them.
Then there was a week in between that and New Years..as..we all know is just, how it is. I went ice skating with Alicia which was cool. Well, not cool enough for the ice to stay frozen, but the other kind of cool.
I also hung out with some chick's I've never met before in my life and I'll probably never see again. They came to visit from Mexico.
I hope Rosa Marina is able to come back. She's good people.
I hooked it up with Season 4 of The O.C. for her. I don't watch it, but she really likes it, so yeah. It's all hooked up-y.
Mi corazon no tiene edad para esperarte.
Then came New Years. I once again made the same choice. It was good times. I blamed Ari for my being pregnant and we came to the conclusion that my trying to be "romantic" comes off as my being all "I'm gonna kill you" so.....that conclusion led to the conclusion of why I don't have a girlfriend.
Then we counted down to the New Year after Alicia Keys did a groovy rendition of No One. I like that song.
And now I'm here.
There was stuff in between I guess.
I went to the mall with a few kids yesterday.
This is the day and the time. I want to believe that we may still have a chance. We took a leap in the dark and I can see now the shadows have turned to light.
I DDR-ed a bit, and got tired and slightly sweaty.
Not much else to tell. All I bought was some food at panda express cus I hadn't eaten anything but cereal in the morning.
And...i ran out of LJ-updatey Juice...and..18 minutes to go. Bah!
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| somebody save me, let your warm hands break right through |
[14 Dec 2007|02:15pm] |
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Hmm..it's been a while, Mr. LiveJournal..that is has.
Sure, I've been checking and being all up in people's business while not providing any of my own.
Well, it's over. I'm very much glad to say. School. For now.
I have finally declared my major: Math & Computer Science.
Let's rock this bitch!
It's Andrew's birthday today. Happy birthday 'Drew!
Well..what can I say? It's been a crazy past few months.
Weddings. Deaths. Illnesses. Exams. Laughs. Frustrations.
It's life, I guess.
Made a few new friends.
Remade a few others.
I cut my hair the day after Angie's wedding.
I guess I didn't have the patience for it anymore.
Zuly keeps yelling at me to grow it back, though. :-D
Not too long after the wedding my mom got sick(er) and had to go to the hospital. She's been on recovery road and she's getting much better.
Then came Violet's wedding. Which of course, was followed by some more hair change-age.
The Thursday after, because there was no opportunity to do this earlier, I dyed my hair blue.
Never had the opportunity to do anything of the such before...I'm too old for my dad to really say much to me about it, and I'm no longer at the bank. Sure, I'm "seasonal" but I'm not going back this winter. So, didn't matter much anymore.
I wonder what I'm gonna turn my hair into after Fabby's wedding. =)
I went to the Serj concert which was good times.
Marvin's cousin R.Marina came to take some classes in English. She left for Mexico earlier this week. She'll hopefully be back in January, she's good people.
I've got my schedule for next semester all taken care of.
I've got Thursdays off!
I reckon this is as much updatey as I can get for now.
I hope all is going well for everybody.
Take care!
~Sparx
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| Gimmy gimme more... |
[05 Oct 2007|11:56pm] |
Well, I thought I'd update with a brief update as well..interesting situation.
we went to this pizza place today for my aunts rehearsal dinner. i liked the pizza and..i ate way more than i should've. and it was pretty cool, and there was music to groove to. well, at any rate, my little cousins had to go to the bathroom, so I led the way. I stepped into the bathroom and I see that there are two urinals on the left wall, and near the right corner there's a toilet. but...the toilet was not within a stall...it was just there..all..out and in the open. so...that was..odd. probably awkward if you ever had to poop. for sure.
that's my update.
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| Sufre Conmigo |
[23 Sep 2007|10:57pm] |
porque siento que todos pasan sin mirar
no lo entiendo, nadie me puede explicar
quiero que sufras conmigo
para que entiendas lo que digo
quiero que sufras conmigo
para que entiendas lo que digo
veo que nadie conoce mi dolor
y no es verdad
que cada dia voy mejor
solo paresco contento
aunque por dentro estoy muriendo
solo paresco contento
aunque por dentro estoy muriendo
pero me aguanto el llanto
llorando sin llorar
y aunque lo intento siento
que no voy a durar
y es que me aguanto tanto
llorando sin llorar
y aunque lo intento siento
que no voy a durar
quiero que sufras conmigo
para que entiendas lo que digo
quiero que sufras conmigo
para que entiendas lo que digo
solo paresco contento
aunque por dentro estoy muriendo
solo paresco contento
aunque por dentro estoy muriendo
sufre conmigo
sufre conmigo
quiero que sufras conmigo
sufre conmigo
sufre conmigo
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| life's a show and we all play our part |
[09 Sep 2007|06:21pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
apathetic |
] |
So, I really don't do much livejournal postage at all...anymore
I reckon it doesn't come as easy as it used to
just to sit here and write long posts about the nothingness which is my life
so idunno
let's see where this is headed
I reckon it'll come easier due to major procrastination on school-related work
so let's rock this bitch
school started
it's the same every semester
i hate it
I like UIC, i really REALLY do
but..i just don't like the being in school thing
I never really did, but I was always good at it
So I'm stuck somewhere between knowing that I need to do this for myself, for growth, for purpose..and knowing that I don't want to do this cus I'm just fed up with caring
Angie's wedding was a little over a week ago
and let me tell you, I had an amazing time
just, the whole set up
it wasn't your typical beanertastic wedding
and i've been to a few receptions to know the difference
there was no reception, instead El Guapo played
and the DJ didn't focus on all them beanertastic songs
and it was just awesome because you could really tell they didn't just plan A wedding
they planned THEIR wedding
it wasn't about just like "oh, we're married, we have to do this, so let's traditionalize the hell out of this"
they showed us that it was their wedding, they put themselves into it, and it was just awesome as we were given more of themselves than you usually see at receptions
i'm looking at this advertisement to the right of where i'm typing...fill out a profile--> get a survey--> get a LJ gift certificate
what the hell do I need a gift certificate to livejournal for?
give me some fuckin college money, damn
so, not working hasn't taken it's toll on me just yet
i know, eventually..i'ma need some cash
but..i'm hoping that by then, i have found a job
to deal with my money-related needs
if not..might as well go back in dec->jan even though i REALLY don't want to
MHMM..i reckon that's all for right now right now
laterz ;-)
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| Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me |
[23 Aug 2007|08:48pm] |
Damn, sirs and madames, it's been a long time.
Last post was in May.
A lot has happened since then.
Well..not A LOT A LOT..but..you know..enough to make me want to pull out my hairs one by one.
No...no..not that much...can't do that to my hair..would hurt.
So, I went to Mexico for 5 weeks. Saw a lot of family and other people. It was good times, but I'm glad to be back.
In the grand scheme of things...i really don't have much to actually say.
the storming since yesterday ain't cool at all.
i could barely sleep...the storm kept me up.
crazy crazy.
and right now..it's all..crazy.
bleh..whatever.
good night, kids.
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| i propose to make myself for you a nearly perfect victim |
[16 May 2007|01:19pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
meh |
] |
I look at the clock and it's 1:19 as I begin typing this.
Just thought that was an important point. i won't finish for a while..cus i'm very much on the a.d.d.ness of it all and scuttling about the house.
I just got some yogurt, I like yogurt. strawberry kind. also..i'ma see if the video for las de la intuicion by shakira is on youtube. i like shakira. strawberry kind. (that made no sense) <3 <3 <3
Spanish
English
that's what we call pimpage up in herre...
i'm pretty sure someone just put the video (in spanish) with the music in english. don't matter, shakira rules no matter what color hair she has.
I reckon we'll backtrack a bit.
last week was finals week. I think i did pretty well on the Latino Studies exam. I wrote my ass off, that I did. I didn't have to take my econ final..cus no matter what, they highest thing i could get in the class was a B, and I had a B. She drops the lowest test score, and in this case it was my Final.
Latin though..i'm not sure how that went. I think I did well enough. I memorized the poem..which..i have no idea what it is now. I forgot like that *snaps finger*
The Calc III final, I did a lot worse on it than I thought I did. I don't know how that happened, I thought I did quite pwnsomely. Whatever. I'm ahead of the game :-D
despacio
despacio
Friday was the only day I worked because I had finals that week so I requested all my finals days off. It was good times, I reckon. We watched Shakira videos at work.
<3 <3 <3
tengo el presentimiento de que empieza leccion
Then came the day of ACEN.
Woke up early to be at Fabby's house at 7:30...we were a little late. Which was completely my fault :(
you're too far to bring you close...i wish luck but i've other things to do!
Ari and I arrived and Fabby was there (well..she lives there so..i reckon it makes sense that she was there) and Fili was there already. So we scuttled on and I met Scott. He's good people, that he is.
We arrived at ACEN and there was this guy with a big pink wig and..it was..odd. Not so much the wig but how he was dressed. But I expected it and I guess..good for him! Cosplay the hell out of your costume, good sir! :-D
I was L. But...there where other Ls scuttling about.
We met up with Sam and Pancho. And we scuttled about, taking pictures as we felt appropriate.
Later on we went to ACEN Idol. I voted for the girl that sang a song by Utada Hikaru.
Then, Fili and Pancho were gone..we didn't know where they were and well, Sam, Ari and I stalked a few people (including Dante) then decided to go to McDonald's. When we got there though, there was a line to get in. WTF? So, we wen to the gas station next door.
So much for the Spartan diet.
THIS IS SPARTA!!
tee hee
We scuttled about some more, and scuttled some more. And then Fabby, Scott, Ari, Fil, and I left so that we could make it back for Zi's graduation get-together.
It was really good to finally eat some real food...not..the gas station bought stuff that I shoved in my face. Gatorade and pastries. *sigh*
Sunday...was fairly uneventful.
Monday was, too.
Tuesday, even worse.
Today...I'm writing.
mis manos las guardo porque tengo frio y se sienten raras dentro del bolsillo.
And that's m'life up until life
Vivir la vida sin ti
es algo como morir
es caminar sin mirar
es como cantar sin oir
es hablar sin respirar
es comer sin dijerir
porque yo descubri que eres la forma perfecta, la exacta justa para mi
~Sparx
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| Congratulations Zuly!!! |
[15 May 2007|09:48am] |
This is a few days late, I know. But I'd like to congratulate Zuly on graduating.
I wasn't able to go to the graduation and it sucks cus I really wanted to be there. Not only was she there for my graduation from MoPo but she's always been there for me since forever. Hell, she basically raised me/marvin/ari. She would yell at us for eating the children's penecillin from mexico when we were little. (that stuff was really good) But she's also been there for me for a lot of personal/familiy stuff that's gone on in my life. And she's always been supportive. I remember when I was younger and I was home sick from school for a while. She helpd me with my homework. Without her I don't think I would've gotten through my first year of college as well as I did. She took me to my placement exams and to freshmen orientation. She made sure I got help in Calc II and tried to get me more socialized, even though I'm a little too reticent for my own good. She's amazing and I know she's more than deserving of a successful life. I know she'll have it and I'm proud to say I'm related to her. :-D
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| nadie como tu me sabe hacer cafe |
[15 Apr 2007|10:23pm] |
From "Becoming Part I"
"There's moments in your life that make you, that set the course of who you're gonna be. Sometimes they're little, subtle moments. Sometimes, they're not. I'll show you what I mean...Bottom line is, even if you see 'em coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really, but it does... So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are... You'll see what I mean."
I guess that's life. Big changes. Big events. You can see someone one way for a long time and, in a matter of a second, that opinion can change. For the better, or for worse. It might take a bigger event to change it for the better. Make you realize what's really there. Make you realize that whatever badness is there, it's better to move on than to dwell.
There's also the realizations that having someone in your life does nothing for you. That something in your life has to change or else you'll be worse off.
Maybe they don't have to be big moments. Can't they be cummulative little ones?
In the end you might regret not going for something you always wanted. You might regret not having the guts to take that chance or not having the chance to grow a pair. Maybe in the end you realize that what you thought you wanted you're better off without. After getting to know someone and realizing what you want out of life, you learn where they stand. You learn how they affect you. Will they lead to personal growth? Or will they just hold you back?
I guess after much deliberation I still don't know the answers to any of these questions. At least not fully. I guess some people I'm sure I'd love to just push out of my life, I'd have to reconsider. Those I'd like to bring in, I'd have to make sure it's not a complete waste of my time, by which i mean, I'm not going to put effort into something that someone else isn't going to take seriously. So where do we go from here? We'll see one day.
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| si tu no vuelves... |
[08 Apr 2007|10:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
sleepy |
] |
A month left. Just one more month. I can do this. Freshmen year is in the bag. I'm sleepy though. I should go to sleep.
Yesterday was very much meh, i guess. I mean, I went to work and it was good times cus I worked with Mikey D. and Lauren. Then I came home and went straight to my great grandmas house where mi padrino helped me out with the taxes. I felt bad cus I know how to do my taxes, it's a 1040-EZ..it's not complicated at all. Then I put it off and then...yeah. I have to mail this izzout. I'm grateful that it's done though, very much so. Then we had some leche de aroz (aroz de leche? the word order has always confused me) and left at around 9-ish.
Today I watched like..america's next top model the whole day. I mean..there was that break in between where I watched american wedding. funny stuff. but..then the rest was america's next top model while laying in bed and eating ice cream. that's..really..depressing. and..ugh. whatever. tomorrow school.
my manager asked me if i was interested in becoming supervisor. after some deliberation within myself, I decided it'd be best not to take the position. It'd be too much, I think. at least for me..and now. with school...and then I'm gonna quit anyway. Sure..it'd be a good thing to have "supervisor" on my resumé, but for now..i need to keep things simple for myself. like i said, i'm gonna quit soon anyway, so whatever. I've been going back and forth with this decision since friday, when it came up. But..i really think that this is what's best in the short run. long run, probably not. But..live for today, man! :-D
plus..it's a lot more pressure than I need...after that lie-detector test, I'd rather not risk extra chances of that kind of stuff. so..yeah. lately i've been listening to Si Tu No Vuelves by Miguel Bose and Shakira. Miguel Bose originally recorded this song alone yeaaars ago. I really like the version with Shakira..but..it kinda depresses me. Enjoy the lyrics (for those of you who'll be able to read them.)
Miguel Bose
"Si Tu No Vuelves"
Si tú no vuelves se secarán todos los mares
Y esperaré sin ti, tapiado al fondo de algún recuerdo
Si tú no vuelves mi voluntad se hará pequeña
Me quedaré aquí junto a mi perro espiando horizontes.
Si tú no vuelves no quedarán más que desiertos
Y escucharé por si algún latido le queda a esta tierra
Que era tan serena cuando me querías
Había un perfume fresco que yo respiraba
Era tan bonita y era así de grande y no tenía fin.
Y cada noche vendrá una estrella a hacerme compañía
Que te cuente cómo estoy y sepas lo que hay
Dime amor, amor, amor estoy aquí no ves
Si no vuelves no habrá vida no sé lo que haré.
Si tú no vuelves, no habrá esperanza ni habrá nada
Caminaré sin ti, con mi tristeza bebiendo lluvia
Que era tan serena . . .
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